It’s amazing how quickly we can let ourselves set up camp in our comfort zones; they’re so comfortable, after all. Safe. Predictable. We know exactly where we stand when we’re there — like being the big fish in the small pond. There’s no fear when we’re in our comfort zones… but unless you do something that scares you, nothing ever changes.
You see, the problem with comfort zones is that, by definition, they don’t challenge us. They don’t encourage us to grow or change or do anything different than what we’ve already done and what we already know. The problem with comfort zones is that they are not where greatness is forged.
If you want something different…
If you have an awesome dream that you’d honestly like to see become your awesome reality, it’s not going to happen while you’re in your comfort zone. The ONLY way that dream is going to happen is if you learn to start pushing yourself out of that same-old, same-old cocoon that you’re so familiar with and start doing something different.
If you want something different in life, then you have to take risks. You have to be willing to be scared. And you have to actually go out and do what you’ve never done before. There is NO other way to make something big happen for yourself. There is no other way to make a big dream come true.
Get out of your comfort zone!
In order to push yourself out of your comfort zone you can either take the cannonball approach and try something HUGE, or you can take the toe-dipping approach and ease your way into things with smaller excursions out of your zone of familiarity. But either way, you have got to make a decision, once and for all, that you’re going to make it happen.
And with each expedition out of your smothering comfort zone and into the unknown, you will gain confidence to try something else. More importantly, you will also gain the desire to continue trying new things and expanding your capabilities.
How I moved out of my comfort zones
For me, joining Toastmasters was a first step out of my comfort zone in my quest to become a better speaker. And with each speech that I did, I had to battle my panic attacks – the sledgehammer pounding of my heart against my rib-cage, the Sahara-dryness of my mouth that made it almost impossible to speak, the almost certain feeling that I was going to throw up.
But with each speech I made, and survived, I gained new skills and, more importantly, new confidence to try it again. In one of my recent speeches, I had someone tell me afterwards that I was a “gifted speaker”. I don’t know if I’d go that far, but I could never have become a good speaker had I not been willing to move out of my comfort zone and do something that scared me.
Likewise, when I submitted my first guest post to a site other than my own, I was consumed with feelings of insecurity and doubt. Would the person like the article? What if they hated it? Worse, what if their audience hated it? What if no one left any comments at all? What if they laughed at me and thought I was just an insignificant newbie with no real credits to her name?
I’ve since been published on the web sites of two Hay House authors, on the blogs of two best-selling authors, and on two of the biggest and longest-lived LOA sites around. And I’m now starting to get people I submit new material to asking me “Didn’t I see one of your articles on so-and-so’s site?” So yeah, I’ve got “street creds” now, but none of that would have happened had I not pushed myself past my self-doubt and done what I was afraid to do.
Do something that scares you every day
So, now it’s your turn: what are you holding yourself back from doing because it’s too uncomfortable? What could you do today that would push you closer to your biggest dreams, if only you could get over your own fears and give it a try? Pick something and give it a try. In fact, do something that scares you every single day this week! And watch how much it starts to change your life…
photo credit: (c) Can Stock Photo
I am learning that you must keep trying and keep going, no matter what. And, for goodness sake, do not compare yourself to others. It is not about that anyway. I have no idea why other people do that, but it is starting not to bother me, so that is good thing!
Comparing ourselves to others is one of the worst things we can ever do to ourselves — especially since we have no real idea about where they are in their journeys compared to ours. There’s a quote that I really love about not comparing our chapter 1 to someone else’s chapter 20, and I always remind myself about that one when I catch myself starting to compare myself to someone else. Another one I like is about not comparing our blooper reel to someone else’s highlight reel. 🙂
I just found this quote by Bill Gates: “Don’t compare yourself with anyone in this world…if you do so you are insulting yourself.”
The thing is Nathalie, that others compare us. They use people as measuring sticks and are like, “So and so did it, why haven’t you” and all that. I wonder how can we prevent hearing these words from others? By focusing only on what we do, keeping our vibe high and just ignoring it? I am sure this will be part of your answer, but I am also sure you do not hear stuff like that, so how do you do it?
Yes, as a matter of fact, I do hear that kind of stuff. Less now than I used to, because I’ve been working on not letting that stuff bother me anymore, which has an impact on how much of that stuff I draw towards me.
From your question, you already know what to do about it. How to do it? Remember what’s actually happening when these kinds of storms are blowing around you. There’s an energy thing happening and you’re at the centre of it, so shift your focus. If you’re not clear about and committed to what it is that you actually want, you will continue to draw these situations to you. They are magnifying that contrast you feel about what you want vs what you think you should want. Get clear, get focused, get committed, and the storms will start to subside.